Fake laughter can be the worst possible sting,
As useful as having to wear fake bling,
So hands up who invented it,
Lets recognize the work of that demented nit,
Who introduced this phoniest thing,
Or did it come from America tied up with string.
America gave the world, some quite marvellous stuff,
They gave us burgers and marketing and motorbikes so tough,
Poets like Bob Dylan and Tom Waites sing real gruff,
There were cars so grand, so stylish and buff,
But when they invented canned laughter,
They’d obviously run out of puff.
When I was a kid I had no TV,
So as I grew up I developed humor for free,
Then I found a TV, and the sitcoms made me pee,
The laughter was as tedious,
As canned laughter can be.
The writers of these sitcoms might have disability in the brain,
They lacked the confidence to know, their product was very plain,
They expected no acclaim,
Washing humor down the drain,
By bypassing normal people we might have considered sane,
So how do you stop an audience from just smirking at their TV,
By telling them we demand laughter,
When it’s as boring as lukewarm tea,
Now the applause button is pushed,
And you can pretend or you can leave,
A generation on fake laughter,
Is as funny as a tree.
Contrast this to old England, where proper humor was the deal,
The best writers used an audience where the laughter came in peals,
So if your funny bone’s in plaster,
Because of rubbish that you’ve seen,
Stay away from American humor,
And end this bad laughing dream.
Poem by John Sanderson
Published February 2025